


If My Heart Was a House

by Emptylester (timelordangel)



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Comfort, Coming Out, Domestic, Established Relationship, M/M, Phan - Freeform, Phandom - Freeform, Shower cuddles, Slight Mention Of Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-11
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-07-22 22:00:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7455460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/timelordangel/pseuds/Emptylester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Phil's been looking at properties again, and it'd sure be nice to get away from all that drilling. So why is Dan so afraid?</p>
            </blockquote>





	If My Heart Was a House

It’s been raining for five hours. Dan pokes at the stir-fry on the stove with a wooden spoon, stifling a yawn as the food sizzles and dies down.

It’s a sleepy evening, one of the first nights home from the USA tour. Dan is thankful for the smell of wasabi and soy sauce coupled with the familiar kitchen and he takes a second to take a deep breath.

“DAN!” Phil’s voice breaks the peaceful quiet and startles Dan.

“What’s up?” Dan places the spoon down and curiously peers out into the hallway.

“Do I have time to shower?” Phil is poking out of his room, currently in the process of removing one sock.

“No, supper’s almost ready, just wait.” Dan waves him off and returns to the stove to save the food from burning.

He missed this so much, just existing with Phil again. They've been enjoying pyjama week.

Phil appears in the kitchen moments later with a huff and begins taking plates out of the cupboard. Dan thanks him as he shuts the cupboard door behind Phil.

“What do you want to watch?” Phil asks as he pours them both a Ribena.

“Game of Thrones, duh.” Dan grins and turns the stove off.

“Or,” Phil pauses, picking up the glasses to take them to the lounge, “we could watch Death Note.”

“Again?” Dan gives a noncommittal noise, “I dunno if a re-watch is in order for that yet.”

“Yeah,” Phil gives a little shrug as he takes his plate from Dan, “I was kind of hoping it could just be background noise.”

“See,” Dan takes a bite and chews while talking, settled into his sofa crease, “your words say sexy, but my stomach says stir-fry.”

“I didn’t mean that.” Phil laughs, pushing his glasses back up his face, “I just meant we could talk.”

“Good grief, three months of internet-void touring didn’t do it for you?” Dan grins and gives Phil a playful shove.

“No, be serious for a second.” Phil smiles but his eyes look a little scared.

“Oh.” Dan straightens up and puts his plate on the armrest. “Okay, what’s up?”

“I happened to be looking at property websites again and I found a small house about twenty minutes from here and it’s been price reduced again.” Phil has a small, nervously excited smile on his face.

“A house?” Dan swallows. “Why?”

“Well, for one, it’s bigger.”

“We don’t need bigger.” Dan counters.

“No, but we’d own it. It’s got three bedrooms, a study, a lounge, a balcony, even a sitting room! I might have Google Earth’d it.” Phil is grinning now, his eyes starry.

“Pet friendly?” Dan cautiously chews another bite of stir fry. He resists the urge to tell Phil to eat his while it is still hot.

“Dan, we’d own it. We could do _whatever_ we wanted.” Phil gives Dan’s shoulder a shove of excitement. “Our lease is up on the 23 rd, let’s at least look at it.”

Dan furrows his eyebrows and makes a small noise.

“Hey, we’ve been tired of the stairs for a while. And the construction outside the windows, the flickering hallway lights, the neighbor’s dog-“

“Phil, just… give me a minute. And eat your damn noodles, they're going to go cold.” Dan says softly but firmly.

Phil backs off. He knows when he’s overwhelmed Dan, who doesn’t like change much at all, and he knows he got a little too excited. The worst bit is that there is a time frame on the house and there are only so many days before their lease runs out and they will be forced to renew or move.

“Just think about it, okay?” Phil gives Dan’s knee a reassuring pat before picking up his plate.

Dan gives Phil a face.

“What?” Phil cocks his head, his mouth full of food.

“Do you know what this means?” Dan asks.

Phil, still chewing, shakes his head, his wide eyes and messy hair make the gesture endearing.

“Right now, we live together because it’s two best bros saving some money and sharing jars of pasta sauce because there’s too much sauce for one person.” Dan says before taking a breath, watching the confused look on Phil’s face morph.

“Yeah?”

“But a house is,” Dan cringes, “A house. A mortgage. A long term thing.”

“Yeah?” Phil repeats, a smile teasing the corners of his mouth. “You say that like it’s going to come out and bite you. _Commitment_.”

“Phil! Literally nobody is going to believe that there’s not something between us if we move into a fucking house. Literally nobody. And our mums? What will they say? And if we actually get a _dog_ and then we decide-“

“Dan. Dan.” Phil puts a hand on Dan’s shoulder after setting his plate on the coffee table. “It’s _okay_. We’ll live fifteen minutes away; we can just say it’s a flat. They won’t know the difference.”

Dan doesn’t respond, he just crosses his arms and looks worried. Outside, rain thuds against the windows and lightning crackles in the distance.

“Maybe- crazy idea here- it’s time we stop trying to hide it?” Phil says.

Dan shoots him a look. “Because that wouldn’t lose us the integrity of our views or anything.”

“People wouldn’t just watch for that.” Phil rolls his eyes. Thunder claps outside, shaking the building.

“Yeah, just like how shipping us isn’t 90% of the fandom now.” Dan says sarcastically, standing up from the couch and grabbing his half-full plate.

Phil follows him into the kitchen and sighs when Dan deposits his dinner and high-tails for his bedroom.

“Look, I wish just as much as you do that coming out wouldn’t change anything!”

“If you don’t want anything to change, we don’t need to do it.” Dan walks out of sight.

“Dan!” Phil shouts after him, the irritation in his voice colliding with the shut door of Dan’s bedroom.

Phil tries to shake it off and wanders back to the lounge to tidy up after dinner, only to end up opening his laptop. It is still on the property finder’s page. The beautiful brick house stares at him from the screen; the climbing ivy on the entry way seems to spell his name as it loops around the windowsills. It is beautiful. It is also identical to the multiple houses on either side of it, pressed against it snugly in the heart of London.

Phil takes a frustrated breath and bookmarks the page, copying the link and sending it in an iMessage to Dan. Suddenly he feels grimy and sticky in the humid heat of the mid-summer thunderstorm and he decides to take the shower he planned before dinner.

  
Dan is still silent and boarded away in his room when Phil passes by on his way to the shower.

“I’m going to have a shower!” Phil calls as he treks down to the washroom, three towels around his waist.

It isn’t until he’s ass naked and leaning back into the worryingly hot spray of the shower nozzle that he feels a bit bad for pressuring Dan into a new living situation. He argues with himself and says that he didn’t really force Dan to do anything, but Phil knows how he comes across when he really wants something- and it’s not good.

His eyes are closed as he rubs shampoo into his hair and hums the Jurassic Park theme to himself. All three bedrooms have en-suites in the new house. Phil smiles, imagining it.

Phil is too engrossed in his thoughts to notice when the door opens and Dan steps in, dropping the towel around his waist and sliding the shower door open.

“Ah!” Phil yelps, opening his eyes suddenly as Dan slips in and closes the door. “Oh.”

Dan doesn’t say a word as he wraps his arms around Phil and buries his face into his soapy shoulder.

“I’m sorry.” His words are muffled but amplified in the ceramic rectangle. “I turn into a jerk when I’m scared.”

“I know.” Phil presses a smile onto the side of Dan’s head.

“Can we think about it for a little bit?” Dan whispers, raising his head to look at Phil after scooting them out of the direct water spray.

“Of course, we don’t have to move house at all if you don’t want to.” Phil smiles, shampoo dripping down his forehead.

“No. I don’t give a shit if we move, this place is kind of crap.” Dan laughs humourlessly, “I mean about telling people. Being open about it. I love you, and I want everyone to know, but I still want to be _me_ , you know?”

  
“You’d still be you.” Phil whispers, a slight frown on his face.

“Would we still be ourselves, or would we just be half of phan?” Dan shakes his head. “Please wash the shampoo out of your hair, it’s giving me anxiety watching it drip into your eyes.”

Phil chuckles and moves back, rinsing his hair. “You know,” Phil sticks his tongue out as he tastes a bit of soap, “We kind of already are half of phan.”

“And don’t think that that makes me unhappy, truly,-“ Dan slumps against the shower wall, “I don’t know what I’m on about. I’m sorry for invading your shower.”

“Hey, you’re alright. I was getting bored anyway.” Phil smiles and links his hand with Dan’s.

Dan lets Phil shampoo his hair for him and enjoys the two-minute head massage which follows. Even better for Phil, however, is the thank-you blow-job when Dan sinks to his knees and Phil about drowns when he throws his head back and can’t keep his mouth shut. In the end, after the shower turns them both into prunes, however, they end up in warm pajamas in Phil’s bed watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

“You’re Ross.” Phil pokes Dan’s arm. Dan’s leaning back onto Phil and Phil has one arm around his shoulders. A bag of Doritos sits between them.

“That was the rudest thing you’ve ever said to me.” Dan scoffs playfully.

“He’s not so bad in the end. He has good intentions.” Phil defends the character, despite the fact that comparing him to Dan was meant to be an insult.

“That’s what I am, a not-so-bad person with good intentions.” Dan rolls his eyes.

“I think I’m Phoebe.” Phil muses, running his finger in small circles over Dan’s shoulder.

“Yeah, me too. Quirky and fun, really good heart.” Dan pokes him back.

“Aww,” Phil grins, “Now I feel bad for calling you Ross.”  


“Good.” Dan sticks out his tongue and reaches for another crisp.

They watch in crunchy silence until the blue ray disk turns back to the title page and the storm outside has subsided enough to be but a gentle pattering on the sides of the building.

“Bed?” Phil asks, removing his arm from Dan to stretch above his head.

“Does it look like four am to you?” Dan smirks. “But feel free to sleep now, I’ll go fuck around on my laptop until the birds wake up.”

“Just try to sleep now, please?” Phil pushes his glasses up and gives Dan puppy eyes.

“Whyyy?” Dan whines, messing with his hair.

“I want you to sleep in here with me, so sue me.”

“Fine. Besides, I should probably go to bed now if we’re looking at the house tomorrow.” Dan gives a knowing smirk and leans to kiss Phil’s cheek.

Phil doesn’t say anything but he can’t hide the massive smile on his face as he flicks off the light.

 

With the gentle rain outside to as their lullaby, they sleep.

 


End file.
